Vintage Thea Porter Market Under Threat

A warning to you, eBay seller kerrytaylorauctions of Pall Mall, London UK:

Look at it this way, you can either come down on your starting bids for these bodacious vintage Thea Porter kaftans (and certainly those inflated estimates―in GBP, no less, as though by halving the figure before my currency conversion aversion eyes, I might frantically begin to justify actually bidding on one or two or all) or else you ought to consider the potential for collapse in the bodacious vintage Thea Porter kaftan market on which your livelihood depends in light of the fact that if I cannot begin to justify paying such exorbitant prices for the pleasure of owning such perfect garments, then I just might have to begin designing and producing my own bodacious kaftans of such exquisite awesomeness that even the originals from the master's own hands shall be eclipsed, causing every right-is-right mama (and the occasional rad lad) to redirect all their kaftan acquisition needs to my tiny shop, Gravel & Gold, and nobody will want these silly overpriced party muu-muus of Thea's anyhow and then I'll be scooping them up by the armload in the town free box because everyone's dumped them, and even though I'll be resting sweetly after nights of  tossing and turning, wondering who will own the yellow one if not me, who will own the plaid one if not me, even then―I'll still be humming to myself, "All I want for Christmas, is you...." because there's no denying who is who in the game of guru and disciple.

Respectfully,

Cass